God restores

Yesterday, a conversation between a good friend and I revealed something that was still hiding under the cracks, and that was the fact that I have not forgiven myself. This was very jarring since I was already a professing Christian at that time, but there are still instances where I would close myself off to others, push them away or start comparing them to the people of the past.

As I was reading an article, I had realized something and that was the fact that God orchestrated everything in my work life to happen as a way of rebuilding me. Back then, I had difficulty interacting with people of various backgrounds and it showed in college and in my first 2 years in work. Now, all the stuff that happened back then humbled me and led me to God through Ms. Rina's Bible study sessions. Soon, I had realized that God was transforming me, but I didn't really notice it as I was just enjoying what has happening.

Even if there were times where I still felt shameful, unworthy and disgusting as the evil one was telling me lies about myself-God never gave up on me, as He was telling me that I had to be honest with Him and with others as well and that His great work was enough. I didn't have to overexert myself to become like Him, as God was already doing it.

Right now, God has impressed upon me to keep my eyes upon Him and made me realize that the incident that happened back in college was a stepping stone for His best, and it is true that only God restores.

Again, I thank God that He has turned me from an awkward egg to a koboy hahaha but seriously, Praise God! He is the only one who can truly change us, that I don't have to be harsh to myself for something I accidentally said 10 years ago and that I don't have to drag anyone into this haha.

I will leave you with this verse:

John 8:36 (NIV) - So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. 

And here's the article that I had just read:

https://www.allaboutgod.com/forgiving-yourself.htm